Last time we left off with the beginning of our long-distance relationship.  I was gearing up for my junior year in high school, Andrew was starting his freshman year in college 700 miles away at Northwestern University (Go 'Cats!).

The first time I ever got between Andrew and his best friend...  Wish I had found this to add it to the last post!

Once again, our relationship became one that survived mainly on Instant Messenger, where we discussed very nebulous future plans that involved moving to Delaware?  Probably because of the no sales tax thing...  At some point we stopped dancing around the issue and realized that we both kind of knew we were getting married some day.  I made the mistake of referring to us as "unofficially engaged" and had an awkward conversation with my youth minister after my sister told him about that...  But look at us now!

We talked on the phone every night starting at 10 pm (9 his time, when free nights started on his phone), usually until I fell asleep.  I'm just now remembering the completely random places I used to sit to have these conversations...like in the dorm hallway or outside in one of the stairwells.  Needless to say, I didn't have much of a social life freshman year.  We wrote each other long letters (about...  nothing?  Mostly how much we loved each other.  Gag.) and counted the days until we would see each other again (literally.  I think I always had a ticker in my IM profile saying how many days left.  Again, gag.).  We also had secret AIM screen names that we would only use to talk to each other (I left this out because it's soooooooo awkward...).  I was SO sad that he wouldn't be able to come home for the homecoming dance, but I only had to wait until Thanksgiving to see him again.  Until his parents decided that they were going to visit relatives for Thanksgiving (in all fairness, his grandpa's wife was pretty much on her deathbed...).

Somehow or other, this meant he got to come home for homecoming?  Because I asked my uncle for help after my parents declined to pay for a plane ticket.

Our first reunion after that looooooong 2.5 months

And I think that was when he broke the news to his parents that he was converting to Catholicism.  They were NOT pleased (his mom told him that 99% of Catholics are going to hell).  We got caught making out in the back seat of his car by the cops (Fully clothed.  No parks after dark, friends!).  And he went back to school until Christmas.

We decided to dress up and go out for New Year's that year, and used a coupon to get our picture taken together at a JC Penney portrait studio.  The woman looked at us holding hands and said, "So...  Are you brother and sister?"  Awkward.

I went to visit him in the spring to see him received into the Church.  Afterwards I asked him how his first confession was.  He said, "I was supposed to go to confession BEFORE the vigil?" Ah, the joys of one of *those* Newman Centers...

Ah yes, I had discovered a curling iron for my too-thick bangs.  Not much of an improvement, nor is the flesh-colored dress...  But look, he's got the shiny new Catholic glow!

Needless to say, we went downtown the next day to go to confession and Easter Mass again.  So...  Not the best RCIA program?

And thus continued our lives, until the next summer, in which he worked fairly regular hours and I did summer school (not remedial, but because that's what you did at our high school if you wanted to do music all 4 years...).  We spent every spare moment together again, I'm sure, and the next year went by essentially the same.  

I was praying and trying to to discern where God wanted me in the future.  My sister was at Notre Dame.  Andrew was at Northwestern.  I didn't have stellar grades, so I wasn't sure I'd get into either school...  I applied to the typical Virginia state schools (UVA, JMU, W&M) and got into all of them, but Northwestern and Notre Dame BOTH wait listed me!  I figured Northwestern just wasn't meant to be, but I REALLY wanted to go to Notre Dame (and my sister really wanted me to go there, too!).  Music was kind of my thing, and Notre Dame is not so strong in that area, but I figured I'd just major in whatever and then marry Andrew once I graduated and stay home and have babies.  So I started calling Notre Dame's admissions office, sending them letters, trying to convince them to let me in!  I visited the admissions office in person when I went to visit my sister for spring break, and tearfully begged a woman to reconsider, because I KNEW I would go to Notre Dame if they would just let me in!

Meanwhile, I accepted a spot on the Northwestern School of Music's wait list too, because I figured it wouldn't hurt and maybe they'd let me in?  But I wasn't sure I really wanted to major in music, because what's the point?

Then I had one of those life-changing experiences at All State Chorus, and KNEW that teaching music is what I needed to do with my life.  I was all set to go to UVA and major in music, when Northwestern called and let me know that I had been accepted off the wait list!  I was going to go to school with my future husband!

I was a little upset that Notre Dame hadn't worked out, but I was absolutely sure that I needed to major in music education, and Notre Dame didn't even have that as a major, so Northwestern was perfect!  I gladly accepted, and got ready to head to Northwestern for college.

Awkwardly, a few days after I accepted, the woman from Notre Dame called and offered me a spot off their wait list.  I felt horrible telling her that I had accepted Northwestern's offer, and she got really annoyed about how she had really tried hard to get me in and I'm pretty sure my kids are going to be blacklisted there forever...  So, if you know anyone in admissions, let them know that if they had had my major, I totally would have gone there!

Two years of long distance was HARD.  But we were finally going to be together!

At least we got to go to MY prom together!

Look!  I graduated!

I'm going to go ahead and finish this up, because we've gotten through the exciting-ish parts...

 College was not particularly memorable, as far as romance goes - our relationship continued to grow, but we had known early on that we were getting married, so there wasn't a whole lot of excitement or drama, just a contented companionship and an itching to graduate already so we could get married!

Ah yes, I was that freshman girl who already had a junior boyfriend...

I had some REALLY good dorm style

Andrew graduated in 2006 and moved back to Virginia, so we started another 2-year long-distance stint.  Sigh.  But he proposed soon after he graduated (DC, reflecting pool, sunset -- That's right, I'm just that awesome) and I anxiously started planning our wedding for 2008.

Meanwhile, we tried to live it up at other weddings...

Fast forward 2 years, I graduated on June 21...

 

We got married in Illinois on June 28...

 

Moved back to Virginia right after our honeymoon...

Taking "selfies" before they were cool.

Got pregnant in October, and had our first baby 2 weeks (two and a half weeks, thank you very much) after our first anniversary...

 

Had ANOTHER baby 18 months later...

And TWO more babies 21 months after THAT!

  5 years of marriage, 6 years of dating, 4 kids, and all at the ripe old ages of 27 and 28.  Whew!

An Amazingly Awkward Love Story: Part II

When we last left off, I had just gotten out of a relationship and Andrew had a new love interest (he reminded me of her and I TOTALLY remember now - that absolutely would have been a disaster!).  Our choir spring trip to NYC was fast approaching, and we were furiously making plans - he would be rooming with his best friend and two other hilarious tenors, and I would room with MY best friends, 3 other sophomore girls.

Somehow our rooms started hanging out with each other a LOT during that trip (possibly because the senior girls had no interest whatsoever in hanging out with high school  boys anymore...Or because none of us wanted anything to do with their little clique) - here we all are crammed into two VERY crowded charter bus seats:

You have never seem a cooler group of people in your life.  Admit it.

Somewhere along the way, we were all told that, for safety's sake, we shouldn't go anywhere without a buddy.  And somehow it made sense for Andrew and me to pair up?  So we sat together at the musicals (Rent & Thoroughly Modern Millie.  You guess which was awesome and which made us both reeeeeeeeeeally uncomfortable...Neither was awesome.  Musicals are awful.  Says the guy who owned more musical soundtracks than any other high school guy I knew...), on the bus, at concerts.  I even suggested that maybe we should link arms while walking to make sure we didn't get separated.  Not surprisingly, he also thought this was a terrific idea.  I used my flirting prowess learned from Saved by the Bell and oh-so-casually rested my head on his shoulder during a concert, pretending to fall asleep.

Smooth.

So smooth.  Not really - no one was fooled.  THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU ASK ME OUT???

And yet, despite the 4-day weekend, he still hadn't asked me out (taking his time, finding the right moment, he says)...  We got back from the trip on Monday (Memorial Day), and Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday came and went.  He was a little less chatty on AIM.  I had practically given up on any hope of a relationship (I decided that maybe the Baptist thing was okay because hey, I could convert him!  Mission dating:  Always (never) a good idea!).

Then on Friday of that week, after many a pep talk from his best friend (who had been in THREE whole relationships, and was thus our resident relationship expert), it finally happened!  He brought me a dozen roses and asked me to be his girlfriend!

Back story: it was the end of the year in AP French Literature and the World Cup was going on.  Our class had spent the morning at our teacher's house watching France lose to Senegal.  Senegal!  It was hilarious.  I ran to the grocery store down the street on my way back to school and carried the flowers very hurriedly to my locker.  I sent my friend down to the choir room to fetch Rosie and bring her to my locker.

16-year-old me was ecstatic!  We even got to sit together on stage for our choir's rendition of "Isn't It Romantic" - it WAS romantic!!!  Gag, right?

AND this meant I got to go to prom with him!  Right?  Nope.  He had asked another girl before he asked me out.  And he wasn't going to bail on her because what kind of jerk does that?  So I still give him crap for not taking me to his senior prom even though we were dating at that point... You can see how much we have matured since then.

But just because we were dating doesn't mean we really knew *how* to date...  Our schedules were SUPER busy, so a week into the whole dating thing and we still hadn't had time to go on an actual date.  And being rather inexperienced, we weren't even sure who was supposed to make the first move when it came to HOLDING HANDS!

Well, his best friend fixed that - he came up to us when we were sitting oh-so-close together and took our hands, interlaced our fingers, and walked away.  Disgusted.

Okay, we had the hand holding down.  But a first kiss?  Huh?

It was after our final choir concert of the year (June 7,  he tells me - exactly one week to the day after we started dating).  We were all at Fuddrucker's celebrating (we now live about a mile from that Fudd's and they just TORE IT DOWN!!!), and he and I kept going off on our own, trying to find some way to work up the courage to kiss each other.  But every time we got alone, someone would happen upon us and ruin the moment!

He made sure to take a picture before it was completely demolished - now our kids will always know that whenever they see a yellow tarp, that's where Mom and Dad had their first kiss!

I had my own car now, having just turned 16 (and being EXTREMELY lucky), so I didn't need a ride home from him - there would be no kiss on the door step...

And so it was that our first kiss was witnessed by another girl that he had to drive home.  We hugged close, I craned my neck waaaaaaaay up (he's almost 10 inches taller than me), and experienced the lightest, softest brushing of lips.  Then we sprang apart and said our good byes!

Imagine how awkward that girl felt when she found out she had witnessed our first kiss :P

That first summer of dating was a little bit ridiculous...  We spent practically every waking hour together, to the point where his mom wouldn't let him leave the house to see me some days because he had been spending too much time with me (I thought she was HORRIBLE for doing that to us...  Now that I have kids, I totally understand!).  On days like that, we would simply sit in front of the computer instant messaging each other about nothing all day.  My sister came home for a few short weeks and I totally ignored her because I was so obsessed with my new boyfriend!  (And yes, it hurts to remember how obnoxious I was back then...)

Yeah, we were jerks.  But he was going off to college and I only had a few months before the inevitable breakup!

He went to Peru for a week for a mission trip and left me letters so that I didn't miss him too much.

He got a hair cut!  I chopped mine off, too!  My braces came off!  We were suddenly a FAR more attractive couple than before.

He started coming to Mass with me so that we could have that extra hour together on weekends.  We began to have deep theological discussions on the trunk of his car, in which I questioned how exactly this whole "inerrancy of the Bible" thing worked in the context of John 6.  And then, at the end of the summer, he discerned that God was calling him to convert to Catholicism!

Obviously a very truncated version of the story.  I always tell people that I didn't convert for Rosie, but I did convert because of her.  I'm not one of those people who just converts for their significant others -- besides, who would do that after three months of dating?

Wait, WHAT?  This relationship that I assumed would end by September...  Maybe there was hope?  I still talked about the future in uncertain terms, discussing all the other girls he would date in college (but I didn't)...  But a couple weeks before he left, he told me (in a letter) that he loved me (With some sort of stuffed animal?  I don't exactly remember.  Nor do I want to.)!  And we decided to brave a long-distance relationship.

WILL THE LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP BE THE END?  (Hint: No.)

To be continued... Part 3 here!

An Amazingly Awkward Love Story

I think I need to preface this by letting you know a little bit about my high school experience...

See, Andrew (my husband, his snarky input in bold) and I went a high school especially for nerds.

No, seriously - The Thomas Jefferson High School for Science and Technology (say that 3 times fast, k?) was the place we both called home for 4 years of our lives.  It's a magnet school especially for students with a high aptitude for math & science.  It has a lower acceptance rate than most colleges.  And it's a haven for nerds.

Also, it was the best high school in the country for five years in a row until last year.  I'm still bitter.

Now, most students in 8th grade don't exactly know what they want to do when they grow up, so if you get into TJ, you GO.  Even if you don't particularly like math or science.  And Andrew actually really enjoyed science (and still does, the astronomy nerd).  Whatever, John Paul loves astronomy too.  And I enjoyed math and science to a certain extent, because they were pretty easy.

However, when you get put in a building with 1600 other students who eat, sleep, and BREATHE math and science, you figure out your real interests preeeetty quickly!

Our high school mascot was a calculator (it started out as a TI-83, but was upgraded to a TI-83+ by the time I graduated).

Our chess team had been undefeated for 14 years when I started.  Our freshman football team had never scored a touchdown.

Our cheerleaders routinely got perfect scores on their SAT.

So it was somewhat surprising to many that we both found our niche in...  Choir?

...

The real story begins:

I was a freshman and he was a junior.

I, with my braces, lopsided bangs, and overly-peppy personality was most likely not the most attractive thing to him.

What, you mean YOU didn't have an ugly phase?

He, with his glasses, butt cut, and mom-chosen wardrobe?  Yikes.  False.  My mother had not chosen my clothes since at least sixth grade.  And he was a tenor (well, still is).  No way would I ever go for a tenor!

He perfected his condescending glare early on, as you can see

We had virtually no contact my freshman year.  He was in a different choir, but we were in the musical together.

Kismet.

(That means fate)

No, the title of the musical was Kismet.  It's perhaps one of the worst musicals ever written (False.  Borodin's music is awesome.), and DEFINITELY one of the worst to perform with a high school.

He was the romantic lead.  I was a slave girl.

He was seriously interested in a girl with a boyfriend.  I remember seeing them sitting close together in the halls, him with his hand on her knee, hoping that they would get together some day.  After all, he had been into her for a LONG time.  I didn't really care about him, until I heard him sing.

Hooooooooooooo boy!  I thought I like basses, but this tenor had me converted.  The sweet, lyrical tones of his voice were enough to make any girl look past the hair and the lack of a car.  But still, I wasn't romantically interested.  And I'm pretty sure he had no idea who I was.

Out of nowhere, his best friend asked me to the Valentine's Day dance.  Huh?  I said yes because hey, a junior asks a freshman to a dance?  Why not?

In an exceedingly awkward "date," I was forced to go to dinner alone with my friends, find my own ride to the dance, pay for my own ticket, and meet him there.  I remember slow dancing to a Backstreet Boys song, which he sang VERY loudly in my ear.

No, the best friend was NOT the one.  (Especially since he has turned out to be a militant atheist.)

Then came the Rob the Cradle dance - my sister and her friends all conspired to ask choir freshmen to the dance.  She convinced Andrew to ask me, because she knew I was enamored of his awesome voice.  We went to the dance together and didn't dance together the whole time...  I couldn't seem to find him, and he never asked me to dance.

Apparently he was behind me the whole time.  As I remember it, she was too busy dancing with approximately 4,325 other people to notice me.

So...  Not the best first date?

Fast forward through the summer, and we were in the same choir together!  But he in the tenor section, and I in the soprano section never sat together.  We were in the same after-school singing group, and at some point my dad got tired of picking me up two afternoons a week.  Andrew told me it was on his way home, so he started driving me home most of the time (I later found out that yes, it was sort of on his way home if he took the most traffic-filled way to get home...).  (No, it actually was on my way home.) (But NOT the way he normally drove home!!!  This was a lot more romantic when I thought he was wasting a lot more time...)  We bonded over our love of baseball and soon started having long AOL Instant Messenger chats about nothing in particular.

Then another friend of his asked me to the homecoming dance.  Again, upperclassman asks underclassman.  Sure?  But this guy had just broken up with his girlfriend of several years, and to make it worse, another one of his friends had asked HER to the dance and we were all in the same group.  AWKWARD.  Andrew didn't even go to the dance.  I'm pretty sure he was still in love with the same girl as the year before.

No, I think I was pretty much over her by then, but I was also into someone else who would have been a disaster in the end.

I was a shameless flirt.  I would have HATED being friends with me back then.  But I was totally not interested in Andrew - after all, he was a Baptist.  No.  Way.  I was going to marry a Catholic, and there's no way I was dating anyone that I wouldn't marry!

At the same time though, we had an awesome time together.  So I started singing alto (HA!), and we sat next to each other joking through much of class.

Sometime around February I started thinking, "Hey, I've never had a boyfriend!  Look, that guy in my chemistry class wears a scapular, we should date!"

So we went about it the high school way - my friends told his friends that I liked him, his friends told my friends that he reciprocated, my friend brought him flowers to give to me to ask me out.  You know, typical high school stuff.

We went on one date.  To see A Beautiful Mind.  He tried to kiss me with his mouth open and I ran into his teeth.

SO romantic.

And thus began my first high school relationship - he didn't understand why I wouldn't sit with him at lunch (his friends had a conversation about how long one of their poops was.  Cecilia would have loved it, but not I...).  Or why I wouldn't let him grab my butt.  I realized that every time he leaned in for a kiss I thought, "Ick!"  So we had "the talk."

Me:  I think we should break up.
Him:  Yeah, we never see each other anyway.

Incidentally, he's married now (to a really beautiful woman) and not Catholic.  So good for both of us!

I still haven't let it go that I married the first girl I dated, but Rosie can't say the same... (You can see that we've both matured a LOT since high school)

Throughout our "relationship" I had many phone conversations with my sister in which I extolled the virtues of the untouchable Andrew Hill.  There came a point where she asked, "So...  Why don't you date HIM instead?"  "Because he's a BAPTIST!" I replied.

At this point, I'm not convinced that we had actually talked about anything faith-related.  So I'm not sure how this was such a large sticking point.  (Because.  BABIES!)

And thus our friendship continued, him driving way out of his way to take me home twice a week, hours and hours of IM conversations about nothing, and what were clearly hints that were TOO subtle on my part (so subtle that they were nonexistent), trying to get him to ask me to his Senior Prom.

WILL ROSIE DISCOVER A CURLING IRON OR SIDE-SWEPT BANGS?  WILL ANDREW STOP PARTING HIS HAIR DOWN THE MIDDLE?  WILL THEY EVER STOP BEATING AROUND THE BUSH AND START DATING???

To be continued...

Stay tuned for Part II, in which a choir bus to NYC brings us closer than we ever would have expected!  Oh and if you're an addict like me, check out more love stories at Camp Patton!