Friday, June 5, 2015

What It's Like Having Toddler Twins: 7QT

"I always wanted twins!"

"It must be so FUN to have twins!"


It's fun.

It is, it really is. So I just smile and nod.

It's fun, but would you also like to know what it's *really* like?


Let's say I take a few minutes to try to eat my breakfast in peace, or get dressed without the twins in the room with me pointing out Mom's wrinkly tummy, or make snack for the kids without somebody reaching up for the knife I'm using to cut cheese into cubes (because I've found cubes are more likely to be eaten than slices right now, but that will change tomorrow)...

This is what happens. A brand new roll of toilet paper in the sink, completely sodden, while they shriek gleefully, "ONCE UPON A TIME DERE WAS A TOILET PAPER!!!" all the while cramming wet toilet paper into their mouths and gagging on it.


They carry their blankets and pillows all around the house making "beds" and "nests" and pretending to nap or have sleepover parties. But come naptime? NOOOOOOOO!!!

They jump in their cribs (in SEPARATE ROOMS because they couldn't nap together anymore), they scream various prayers to each other through closed doors, they take their noise machines, unplug them, and throw them on the floor.

All that playtime devoted to naps, and they refuse to practice what they preach during *actual* naptime.


In the event that you ever have twins, or think you might some day have twins, I suggest throwing away every writing implement in the house NOW. Or install a shelf suspended from the ceiling that can only be reached by VERY tall people, and put all the pens, pencils, crayons, markers, and sharpies up there. Because you know what will happen otherwise:

"I was dwawin' a stwaight yine!"


I'm STILL finding new places where Mary Claire explored with the Sharpie.
They told me they were painting their nails.

And yes, it's still all over her legs and toes.

Cecilia drew this, and I can't help but agree with the sentiment. Yes.


Somebody is probably laughing. Or is that crying? Or is it both? Probably both.

Sometimes you're just GWUMPY!

However, they're probably arguing about which twins is grumpy. And crying about it. While they're arguing, they'll also argue about which one of them is a kid and which is a toddler. And who's big and who's little. And whose birthday it REALLY is (spoiler alert: you're twins. You don't get your own birthday.).


Somebody is probably wearing dress-up clothes. In fact, everybody usually is:

And with all the outfit changes, later on somebody else will probably only be wearing underwear. Hopefully there's at least underwear involved.


There are peaceful moments sometimes though, I promise!

Like when they ACTUALLY whisper the entire time at the library!

Or when they really sweetly read to each other in the bed they shouldn't be in.

Or try to help each other get their big sister's shoes on when they inevitably fall off.


Yup, it's insane. And fun, and sweet, and frustrating. Want to come babysit?

Linking up with Kelly at This Ain't the Lyceum for 7 Quick Takes - Happy Friday, and I hope your week was better than mine!

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