The Art of Raising a Baby: A How-To Guide by a 3-Year-Old

This morning Cecilia has gotten a lot done.  She gave birth to twins, named them (Tinkerbell and Tinkerbell), helped them grow up so that she could have another baby (Claire), changed her twins' names (Sam and Alice), and "washed" Mary Claire and Elizabeth's hair multiple times in the play kitchen.

She's considering the vocations of princess, mermaid, and nun.  Not motherhood?

She's basically perfected the art of staying at home, which is good because I could use a helper once this baby is born in November.

See how much she loves babies?

Here are some of her nuggets of parenting wisdom:

Sleep Training:

Cecilia: When da new baby is born, I will hold him forever and maybe he will even SLEEP IN MY ARMS!!!

With this look on her face all the time, no doubt - baby heaven!

 Cecilia: Mom, sometimes, when da new baby is ready to go to sleep, I'll rock him until he falls asleep.



Me: What if you keep rocking him and he doesn't fall asleep?



Cecilia: Den I'll just put him in da crib and he can sleep dere.  You need to build me a ladder to get him into da crib.

Yes, because that's how it works - just put a newborn down and he'll fall asleep on his own...

So. Happy.

Feeding:



Cecilia: Mom, when da new baby is born I'll hold him while he's nursing so he doesn't fall on da floor.

Good thing, because I was planning on latching him and then dropping him immediately?

Bathing:

Cecilia: Mom, when da new baby is born, probably he'll need to take a bath in a bowl because da bathtub is too big and full of water and he might drown.

And I explained the concept of baby bathtubs and sinks to her...  And the fact that he's not gonna get bathed that often because, hello, fifth child...

Entertaining:

Surprisingly, a wipe is an amusing plaything for a young baby...

Cecilia: Mom, I'm gonna write da new baby a story - it's about an eyelash trying to get in a dinosaur's mouth.

Sounds promising...

Babies are tasty, did you know?

Fashion:

Clothing optional?

Cecilia, wearing her apron: I have dis on because I have babies and dey have snot on dem and a lot of blood on dem, so dis keeps me clean.

Changing into a bathrobe...

Cecilia: And now it's nighttime, so I have to put on my bathrobe because I just wear my apron during the day.

What can I say, she learns from the best?