Friday, January 23, 2015

What They Said, January Edition

Because I'm 99% sure the "funny" part of this blog is solely the stuff my kids say...

John Paul:  Oh!!!  Peter!!!  I have something to tell you!!!
Me:  What?
John Paul:  There are three persons in the Trinity!

John Paul, reading about the reproductive system: How many eggs do you have left?
Me: Um, I don't know... I think girls are born with about 400000?
JP: *puzzlingly* So... There are four of us... So... Maybe... Threeeee.... Threeeee hundred and... Ninety nine thousand... Oh, there are FIVE of us... So maaaaaybe... Three hundred and ninety nine thousand and ninety five?
Me: Could be.
JP: Yeah, I might be right!

JP, dancing around:  Mass in the morning, Mass at noon!  Mass in the evening, fly a balloon!  I made up a poem!!!

Me: John Paul, you're really good at spelling!
John Paul:  Oh, I can only spell short words.  Not long words, like... Metatarsophalangeal.

Yup.  Me neither.

Overheard during naptime...

JP: No, don't call me baby!
Cecilia: What do I call you, then? Bighead?
JP: YEAH!!! Bighead, bighead!!!
Cecilia: 'Cuz you have a big head?
*wild giggling*

John Paul and Cecilia are playing a heads and tails game on the calculator...

JP: Heads!
Cecilia, about to cry: I wanted a tail!!!
JP, reassuring her: You had a tail when you were in Mom's tummy!
Cecilia: *giggles, completely fine now*

Me: Cecilia, why are you dressed in that outfit?
Cecilia: Mom, it's my armor.
Me: And why do you need armor?
Cecilia: Mom, because dere are always wars.
Me: Oh, and you need to fight in them?
Cecilia, sticking a plastic sword down the front of her leggings: Yeah.  And Mom, where's da scabber?
Me: You mean the scabbard?  

Apparently she and John Paul were fighting in World War I and World War II.  With swords.  Wearing armor.  We may need to have a history lesson one of these days...

Undershirt and leggings: Perfect January attire.
Cecilia: Mom, I don't want to live on a farm. I just want to live on a... *dances around wildly for several seconds* FAAAAAAAARM!!!

Um... Okay?

Me: What would you do if you met a dinosaur?
Cecilia: If I met a baby triceratops I would be VERY happy because I have been always looking for a baby triceratops!

Cecilia:  Mom, John Paul's da bravest kid.  But God's braver than him.  God's da bravest grown-up.

Me: Be careful Mary Claire, I don't want you to get hurt!
Elizabeth, cheerfully: I'm hurt!
Me: You are? Where?
Elizabeth, looking down: ... My skin.  But... My yeggings are warm!

Mary Claire, lining up toys on the windowsill: Dat's Elizabeth lion cub, and dat's Mary Claire lion cub, and she wants chocolate. And dat's mom lion and she ate all da chocolate!

Yup.  She's probably right.

Mary Claire, carrying a tower of mega blocks: And here's my fun castle dat I made!
Castle falls
Mary Claire: It fell down! It turned into guacamole!

Of course?

Mary Claire: Iiiiiii'm...
Me: The cutest?
Mary Claire: NO, I'M not the cutest!!!
Me: Then who is?
Mary Claire: LIZABETH is da cutest!


I start singing Rudolph, at Cecilia's request...

Mary Claire, incredibly angry:  NO Mom!!!  Rudolf is from BUSYTOWN!  DAT doesn't even make SENSE!!!

I don't know why even I try.

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