Elizabeth runs to John Paul to give him an enormous and adorable hug
Me: Aw John Paul, she loves you so much!
JP: Elizabeth and I are getting married!!!
Elizabeth crawls away
JP: Oh, she crawls when she gets married...
 |
| The runaway bride |
...
Cecilia, in the bathroom: Mom, my booty's wet!
Me: Why is your booty wet?
Cecilia: Um, because I wanted to surprise you!
Me: A good way to surprise me is not by dipping your booty in the potty. Maybe just hug me and say, "Hey Mom, I love you!"
Cecilia: Or pwetend da floor is made of ice!
Also a way to surprise me...
...
Cecilia: John Paul, can we pway Aladdin next?
John Paul: NO! WE'RE PLAYING NEW TESTAMENT!!! CALL ME JESUS!!!
Cecilia: Um, next time can we pway Aladdin?
John Paul: NO! We'll play OLD TESTAMENT next!
Totally normal, I promise...
 |
| "I'm walking on water!!!" No God complex here or anything... |
JP: I look like Elizabeth!
Andrew: Not really... How do you look like Elizabeth?
JP: Because I have a head.
Andrew: Lots of people have heads... Cecilia has a head, Mary Claire has a head...
JP, amazed: YOU have a head!!!
...
Cecilia, coming in while I'm nursing Mary Claire: Oh, hi kitty!
John Paul: She's not kitty! We're playing Old Testament, and she's Judith!
Cecilia: She's not Judas! Dad is Judas!
John Paul: No, JuDITH!
Cecilia: No, KITTY!
Me: No, Cecilia, he's saying Judittttthhhh, not Judas.
Cecilia: Oh! Hi Judif!
later...
Cecilia: And who am I in the Old Testament?
John Paul: Oh, you're Ruth. And Elizabeth is Esther. And Dad is Malachi. Mom is Moses's mom and I'm Isaiah!!!
Aunt Sister: Why don't we choose names where we're all in the same story? So we could play... Pentateuch!
Cecilia: And I'm Roof!
John Paul: NO! We're playing Pentateuch! Ruth is a Historical Book!!!
She got told.
 |
| Judith and Esther, bffs |
John Paul, to Mary Claire: Hi, King Herod!
Mary Claire: blank stare
John Paul: Baby Herod, I'm Baby Jesus!
Mary Claire:
John Paul: Baby Herod, you're so sweet!
Mary Claire:
John Paul: I'm gazing at Baby Herod, and Baby Herod is gazing at me!
#thingsmostfouryearoldsdontsay
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| It's a little-known fact that Herod was, in fact, a midget in rainbow baby legs. |
Your turn! Heard anything funny lately? Share your snippets with the link-up tool!
I have no doubt that both our John Pauls put me to shame when it comes to Old Testament knowledge!
ReplyDeleteI think John Paul catechizes me more than anyone else ever has!
DeleteOh my gosh...John Paul and Cecilia are too funny together!
ReplyDeleteThey crack me up :) Thank goodness she's such a little peacemaker, or their conflicts would get a LOT more heated!
Delete::helpless tears of laughter:: Ohmygoodness, those children are ridiculous!!!
ReplyDeleteWow - John Paul is with the Old Testament what my son is with dinosaurs....maybe we need to start reading to him from the Bible more!
ReplyDeleteSo, so funny! I can't wait until the girls start conversing! And I love that you made this a link-up! The world needs more laughter caused by the mouths of babes! :)
ReplyDeleteabsolutely hilarious!!! i love reading these!!
ReplyDelete